It has been an interesting time for the relationship between my parents and I over the last few years as I’ve moved out of home, quit my job and taken off overseas.
The biggest point of difference we’ve had, being around money and financial security. I’ve struggled to get them to understand that the money I ‘wasted’ paying rent while living out of home actually afforded me other intangible things such as freedom, convenience and independence. Things (particularly freedom), that I currently value more than physical bricks and mortar (which just don’t translate into anything meaningful for me right now). I agree that saving and putting money towards your future is a very sensible thing that you should do if you’re able to, but what I can’t reconcile is the notion of being held back in the now, for a future that I can’t even see yet.
If those loan repayments for a house you’re not even going to move into or sell until you’re 50 are holding you back from traveling the world (or racing that car or starting that fashion label) now, then something’s amiss. The life you are living now is the only life you are guaranteed.
Yes, this may be a very typical Gen Y outlook to have and I can only speak for myself, but if this is the position that I’m in, then so be it. Ultimately we are all products of our environment and circumstances that we have been lucky/unlucky enough to enjoy/have to deal with. Technology, globalisation, the economy and how hard my parents have worked to set my brother and I up in Australia after emigrating from Vietnam, have put me in the position I am in now to make the choices that I find myself facing. Spoilt compared to other generations? Sure. But why should we feel bad about it? I think this is stopping my parents and I from seeing eye to eye on this, but how could we if we are standing on different tiers of the pyramid?
They have worked so hard to provide an education for me so that I wouldn’t need to worry about it as much as they did when they set out to set up a life for themselves. This is the head start that they wanted for me and this is the head start I have now which gives me some confidence in my ability to earn money, but there is still a disconnect in the realisation of the achievement of this. What I am having trouble explaining to them is that now that I don’t need to worry so much about earning dollars and cents, I can concentrate on and give priority to the life currencies of time and energy.
I understand that my parents have wanted for us, what they were brought up to believe is the best for us but this has so vastly changed from their generation to ours. I’ve managed to explain this to them, but Rome wasn’t built in a day and so, the struggle continues, but thankfully, for a good cause and with slow but evident progress.