As car enthusiasts, the people around us look to us for leadership and advice on matters automotive. Just think about how many times you have been given a vague list of mechanical symptoms by a person with hopeful eyes, until you babble something that seems coherent.
We have a responsibility to employ a more comprehensive understanding of driving.
In Sydney, peak times see 39 minutes added to an hour of travel. That is nearly the worlds worst.
The below outlines some of the techniques that can help to reduce traffic I have had plenty of time to consider over 10 years of commuting on Sydney’s most congested roads.
ONE FOR ONE
Merging traffic is a zipper. When two tracks become one, zippers interdigitate, the slider smoothly connecting two rows of teeth. Try and force an extra tooth on one side and the slider jams up fast.
Merging lanes are choke points. They are where commutes become crawls. Traffic radiates from ‘Left Lane Ends’ signs from Pyrmont to Penrith.
‘One for one’ is the unwritten road rule. Most people consciously or subconsciously adhere to it. It works amazingly well in the rare situations where everyone is on the same page. It only takes one impatient Bluetooth earpiece, intent on a three metre advantage, to jam the zipper.
DOMINO BUTTERFLIES
A person is driving at 55km/h in a 60 zone on a two lane carriageway in heavy but freely moving traffic. Noticing the right lane is moving slightly faster, that person quickly indicates and changes lanes without properly checking their blind spot, cutting off the driver behind.
To avoid colliding with this reprobate, the driver behind hits their brakes suddenly and slows down.
Subsequently, the driver behind our initial anchor-grabber needs to brake. The driver behind them then reacts, braking.
The cars behind them brake. Rippling outwards in a wave, the initial jab of the brake pedal extends 50, 100, 200 cars away.
Human reaction delays mean each braking instance is more sudden; shaving off more speed until eventually, cars come to a complete stop.
Referring to the original example; from a smooth 55km/h, a standstill has now developed in the right lane.
Noticing the opposite lane flowing more freely, following drivers immediately seek to change their fortune.
Harried and in a rush, they choose small gaps or merge carelessly/aggressively. The drivers behind them are forced to brake.
MISTAKE PAYMENT
Premeditation and predictability are the qualities of traffic masters.
Miss your turn? Didn’t notice the car ahead was indicating right? Bus stopping ahead of you?
Quickly indicating and swerving into the next lane will cause someone to stamp on their boring pedal. You might now understand why you want to avoid that, re-read the previous section if you don’t.
You made an error. That’s fine, it happens.
Sit, and wait for traffic to clear before going around the bus. Drive around the block if you missed your turn, rather than attempting to swerve across three lanes of traffic to make the exit.
EGO DEATH
In traffic there is no place for the narcissist. Traffic is a living thing that you and your car form a miniscule part of the moment you roll out of your driveway. Nothing is more important to traffics health than continuous flow, and what is good for traffic is good for you.
If you drive a taxi or a tray back utility, or European SUV with ‘My Family’ stickers on your rear windows, focus on mastering the easier skills before attempting this one.
The moment the car is on, your ego must be turned off. In traffic you are entitled to nothing; you only deserve what you are willing to give.
That forbidden tickle of murderous intent you feel as motorcycles white line past you is your ego**.
The indignant rage at the inconsiderate unfairness that bubbles in your stomach when somebody begins indicating to turn right when a light turns green, is your ego.
Driver and car are a cell moving about a body. If you become noticeable, you are malignant. In the same way as a cell, you probably won’t be noticed until you are not doing your job properly and you cause problems for the other cells – slowing them down, forcing them to brake or evade.
The only God to traffic is perpetual motion. Every action you take should be taken to improve that motion, never just to improve your place within in.
CRASH N’ RUBBERNECK
It’s 2015. There is a camera, a video camera and a note taking device in your pocket at all times. If you are unfortunate enough to be involved in a minor accident where there are no injuries and your car still drives, get out of your car, take three quick photographs of the damage and number plates and get back in*.
Drive the car onto the hard shoulder, or down a side street. Get as far out of the way and as far away from traffic as you can. Swap details, call your insurance company.
Do not sit in the middle of the M4 inspecting damage and looking bewildered, or arguing with the other driver. Just get the fuck out of the way.
For what it’s worth, rubbernecking at accidents and other roadside attractions is also a significant cause of traffic (and kind of dark). You shouldn’t do it, but you shouldn’t text and drive either and no amount of words seems capable of preventing either of them.
THE WAVE
In heavy traffic, you can’t help but be an annoyance to someone else. That also means people can’t help but annoy you.
When someone lets you in, waits for you, or renders any courtesy on the road, throw them The Wave.
It costs nothing, a small concession that demonstrates humility and alleviates anger.
Even if you aren’t sure if they deserve it, go ahead and throw them one. The Wave is just like an uncertain dress code: better to be overdressed than an arrogant dick.
Extra points are awarded for dedicated window roll down, spirit fingers out the window waves.
Triple points for responding to a middle finger with a shit eating grin and a thumbs-up.
Everyone is in a rush, nobody likes traffic. Everyone has a time they need to be at the place for the thing. At one time or another everybody will sit in their car regretting not having used the bathroom before leaving.
You aren’t special, stress or anger do not equate to entitlement. There will always be a dick; the best way to fight back against the dicks is by working hard to never be one.
*Only where you have judged it is absolutely safe to do so
**Lane filtering is legal in NSW for fully licensed riders in stationary traffic provided they do not exceed 30km/h, or filter between the curb and other vehicles. Deal with it.